My Stories

A young and successful executive was travelling down a neighborhood street, going a bit too fast in his new Jaguar. He was watching for kids darting out from between parked cars and slowed down when he thought he saw something. As his car passed, no children appeared, instead, a brick smashed into the Jag's side door. He slammed on the brakes and spun the Jag back to the spot from where the brick had been thrown.

He jumped out of the car, grabbed some kid and pushed him up against a parked car, shouting, "What was that all about and who are you? Just what the heck are you doing?" Building up a head of steam, he went on. "That's a new car and that brick you threw is gonna cost a lot of money. Why did you do it?"

"Please, mister, please, I'm sorry. I didn't know what else to do!" pleaded the youngster. "I threw the brick because no one else would stop."

Tears was dripping down the boy's chin as he pointed around the parked car. "It's my brother," he said. "He rolled off the curb and fell out of his wheelchair and I can't lift him up." Sobbing, the boy asked the executive, "Would you please help me get him back into his wheelchair? He's hurt and he's too heavy for me."

Moved beyond words, the driver tried to swallow the rapidly swelling lump in his throat. He lifted the young man back into the wheelchair and took out his handkerchief and wiped the scrapes and cuts, checking to see that everything was going to be okay.

"Thank you, sir. And God bless you," the grateful child said to him. The man then watched the little boy push his brother to the sidewalk toward their home. It was a long walk back to his Jaguar... a long, slow walk. He never did repair the side door. He kept the dent to remind him not to go through life so fast that someone has to throw a brick at you to get your attention.

Life whispers in your soul and speaks to your heart. Sometimes, when you don't have the time to listen... Life throws a brick at your head. It's your choice: Listen to the whispers of your soul or wait for the brick. Do you sometimes ignore loved ones because your life is too fast and busy leaving them to wonder whether you really love them?

There once was a King who offered a prize to the
artist who would paint the best picture of peace.
Many artists tried. The King looked at all the
pictures, but there were only two he really liked
and he had to choose between them.

One picture was of a calm lake.
The lake was a perfect mirror, for peaceful
towering mountains were all around it. Overhead was
a blue sky with fluffy white clouds. All who saw
this picture thought it was a perfect picture of peace.

The other picture had mountains, too. But these
were rugged and bare. Above was an angry sky from
which rain fell, and in which lightening played. Down
the side of the mountain tumbled a foaming waterfall.
This did not look peaceful at all. But when the King
looked, he saw behind the waterfall a tiny bush
growing in a crack in the rock. In the bush a mother
bird had built her nest. There, in the midst of the
rush of angry water, sat the mother bird on her nest.

The King chose the second picture as the winner.
"Because," explained the King, "peace does not mean
to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble,
or hard work. Peace means to be in the midst of all
those things and still be calm in your heart. That
is the real meaning of peace."

Author Unknown

From reading over entries in this site, there seems to be much suffering and fear. In my own life, I have found a way to constantly evolve myself and experience the Divine (God, Healing, Light, Jesus, etc.) on a daily basis. It has had far-reaching impacts in my life, which I'd like to share, below.
The secret is a meditation practice called Sahaj Marg, or Natural Path Meditation. Does it take some work? Yes. But the benefit is so much greater than effort put in. And in case you're curious - there are no fees involved, and there are centers across the U.S. - in all 50 states, I believe.
One of the first things I noticed that every morning, after I meditated, I felt energized yet calm, with a bright outlook for the day. Over time (a month or two), I found that it was easier to do the daily tasks of my life - everything from household chores like washing the dishes, to expressing my views when I felt threatened, to doing my work (which was studying, as I was a college student). And I noticed that these changes were occurring regardless of how "deep" I went in meditations - even if my mind was overrun by thoughts, I'd still feel better afterwards.
I began to change on the inside. Rough, self-abusive thoughts began to lose their strength and disappear, replaced by a more compassionate way of relating to myself. I became more in touch with my feelings, and began to have real faith and trust that everything would be ok, even when scary things were happening in my life. I began to feel guided in my life - like my heart "knew" what was right for me, and I didn't need to rely on the confusing world of my thoughts and rationalizations to make decisions.
Then came the "emergence" experiences. Like dreams of being pregnant and giving birth (I am male). Feelings that something amazing was going to happen soon. A conviction that came from deep within that my life has a profoundly important purpose, which would be revealed soon. A shimmering feeling inside that would appear and say "Yes" to certain thoughts. And much more.
While these changes were happening on the inside, things were shifting on the outside as well. I began to meet people whom I connected with on a very deep, spiritual level. I realized that my job was something that I needed to quit, and within a few months found an ideal job. Next weekend, in fact, I am moving into a new apartment that perfectly suits my needs... Things in my life started to work out perfectly - with little effort. Or I should say, just the right amount of effort - and no more.
While everyone's experience in life is unique, I've compared notes with others doing my meditation practice, and there are some definite similarities. So I share this because I want you to know that the chaos, fear, suffering and evil of this world can be transcended - that we do have a choice.
Feel free to drop my a line:
heartcentered1 (at) gmail.com
More on the meditation practice, and how to start:
http://www.srcm.org

Three things:

Three things in life that, once gone, never come back -
Time
Words
Opportunity

Three things in life that may never be lost -
Peace
Hope
Honesty

Three things in life that are most valuable -
Love
Self-confidence
Friends

Three things in life that are never certain -
Dreams
Success
Fortune

Three things that make a man -
Hard work
Sincerity
Commitment

Three things in life that can destroy a man -
Wine
Pride
Anger

Three things that are truly constant -
Father
Son
Holy Ghost

I ask the Lord to bless you, as I pray for you today;
to guide you and protect you, as you go along your way.
His love is always with you, His promises are true.
And when you give Him all your cares, you know He'll see you through.
Pass this along to People you want God to Bless - I just did

Angels are perceived by most of us as beautiful creatures with large feathery wings, I know since I've been painting them for over thirty ears now. But yo know angel have wonderful voices that can not only be heard quite clearly but also be heartfelt. Now I say this with conviction for I've been blessed with a sensitivity to angel's voices so I've been listening to their sweet music for as long as I can remember.
It took me quite a long time to realize that all those endearing melodies that I was given to hear since so very early in my life were unfortunately not heard by many people so I took it as a blessing.
There are two things that I clearly remember from my childhood, one is the sacred silence I loved to feel so much because I knew angel voices would follow if I just paid attention long enough and the other one is the excitement I got from drawing the visions they inspired after. Visions that would linger until I would set them on paper with either simple graphite or rich blue ink.Only my dear mother knew back then where the images had come from just as she also guessed about the melodies I would often whistle and even sing on many occasions. Everybody else were simply amused by my original creations as it was, I was simply the weird kid who preferred to sit alone in his room instead of going out and playing ball with friends. They were right about that so I was a loner but a happy one indeed.
By the time I turned eleven, I had learned to play guitar just so I could remember some of these melodies and I still enjoyed drawing of course but had less time time to do it with school and all. That's when I had my first apparition and I must admit that it was a rather traumatic experience for me since the angel that came to me that day simply had no wings that I could see anyway and he didn't glow as brightly as imagined he should. Now I'm getting ahead of myself, I apologize!
That's another story that I promise to share with you later because it shaped the rest of my life but let me get back to angel voices for now.
I must admit I don't know why I'm sharing this experience with you but I just feel it's time for me to do it, I'm even convinced that some of you might benefit from it. So I'm now ready to open a door that stayed shut for nearly half a century, all in the hope that it will help others hear those beautiful voices of angels because their message is crystal clear, it's one of peace and eternal love. And let me tell you that you come out of such an experience feeling there is so much more to life that meets the eyes and ears for that matter
Having seen angels twice in my life already, you could say it's quite easy for me to believe in them but I should point out to you that I had heard the angels way before I ever got to see one.
There are surely more ways to get to hear heavenly voices but this is my method to become receptive to them. Just find a very quiet place where you feel secure enough to let go of your defense reflexes, turn off the light or dim it so you are not distracted by anything around you and of course make sure there is none or very little sound at that time where you are. Now just let yourself relax until you feel yourself carried into a peaceful mental space where your awareness shifts to the spiritual and frees itself from the boundaries of time and physical space. You will not be going into a meditative state although it is very similar in many ways but having stayed focused on angels, instead you'll be entering into a "receptive to angels state" and that is when you'll begin to hear them and experience the joy they bring. What an uplifting experience that is! I wish it for everybody, hearing angel voices is quite convincing that life goes on long after our bodies give up.
God bless you ! LorAnge

I invite you to share your experience me and view some of my angel-art paintings while you are there if you wish at http://lorange-art.com/angels.html , I'll be glad to respond to you if you should decide to write.

My life as and Echo
by Joe Fedele

Basketball season was beginning, I missed the last half of the previous season after fracturing my elbow, but the time I did play I started as a junior and lead Nassau County in rebounding. The first day of practice my coach pulled me aside and said "Joe, I'm a little weary about doing this because I don?t think you have the responsibility in you, you fool around too much but I'm going to make you captain." I really did not care about being captain at all, but coach was right my responsibility was as visible and as easy to find as Atlantis, but I was the best player on the team so I knew coach had no choice. At the time all my friends (who all excelled in school) were choosing colleges and talking about their plans for the future, when someone asked me I would make up a joke to cover up my lack of responsibility for myself. I said "future??" I had no idea, none about college or why even to go to college, all I knew is I wanted to go to Oneonta because I heard about its nickname "Stoneonta". Basketball season finally began, I was playing well and still didn?t care about school, it was about that time when college applications were due but I said "ehh I'll do it later". The only thing that I valued at this time were to somehow getmoney so I could buy alcohol, or steal it from my parents liquor cabinet, so I would steal money from my parents and sisters. Weekends came and wentlike weekdays; it seemed like when I wasn?t drunk or stoned I was playing basketball. Christmas time came and to just try to let you understand the kind of person I was (if you haven?t yet) this is what I bought my family for the holidays; my older sister who was 19 years old a Doll from the Dollar Store called "Nancy", my younger sister who was 14 years old the matching doll from the same dollar store only this doll's name was "Samantha". The one gift I actually spent more than $1.07 was for my mother and I bought her a U2 videotape she had wanted, but I made up for that when I bought my Dad (this is no joke) a can of dog food, and a Star wars toothbrush. I told my family "I thought that they were funny", in other words that meant I didn?t want to spend money on you because I'd rather spend my money on pot and beer. Its the truth I actually added up all the money I had and calculated the amount I would need to get me through winter break for all the kegs, and parties and the remainder of that calculation would be the amount of money I could spend on gifts. Come to think of it I don?t even remember buying my girlfriend a gift. As the days after Christmas went on everyone was talking about New Years, and how it would be the best ever yada yada yada. New Years eve came and my parents had gone out so I invited my friends over to drink before we would go out. My friends and I bought this bottle of wine to celebrate and we passed it around all drinking from the bottle, we eventually went to this party that in time got broken up by the police, so I told all of my friends that we could bring the party back to my house. My parents were so incredible they must have been drunk, they let me a 17 year old punk bring my drunk friends back to their suburban home to drink more! (Wow).

This is the day when things began to get weird for me, I didn?t have one drink all night, I tried, and tried and my friends kept trying to edge me on to drink but I couldn?t. "I feel like I have to throw up,? I would keep
saying and I sat outside my house trying to throw up. I thought nothing of this and didn?t really tell anyone about it, so I went inside and continued to host the party. The next few days I just slept, (I just thought I was very tired from New Years) but then I had basketball practice. At practice I was leading the usual warm up drills that consist of lay up lines and other easy drills. After I completed my first lay up I stopped running to catch my breath, which does not make sense I only jogged half the distance of the court and I was out of breath, it didn?t make sense because I was in excellent physical condition and had done this thousands of times before and have never been out of breath. I thought to myself that I just have a hang over from the night before. After an extremely struggling practice I went home and complained to my Mom about a pain in my lower back, she gave me a heating pad for it so I heated it and went to sleep. The following day in school I slept through all of my classes, which didn?t seem unusual at first but I was sleeping because I was exhausted not because I didn?t like math or science. That day at practice my coach saw me struggling and asked me if I were alright, I replied yeah yeah I'm fine, not wanting to get any special treatment or let him know I am tired. This went on for about 4 days and after practice, or a game each day I would go home to put a heating pad on my back and sleep all night long, even my girlfriend?s birthday. I had enough of this unbearable pain in my back; I told my Mom that I needed to go to the doctor to find out what this is about. The day went on and I couldn?t make it through school, I had gone to the nurse to lay and sleep, and even to the library to lay down on the floor in the back to sleep and help ease the pain of my back. Most of my teachers thought I was just tired and didn?t seem to care, but one of them thought I had sick and kept urging me to see a doctor. She happened to be the only teacher who gave me an A my chefs 12 teacher. She saw and knew that I wasn?t myself; I wasn?t smiling, or active at all. I actually was limping when I walked or ran because of the strenuous pain in my back. At practice that day my teammates kept asking me if I was alright and I finally said no, I told them how weak I was and that I have felt this way since the beginning of January. They told me I looked "yellow" (referring to my skin) and that my eye's were also yellow, they were calling me a Mutant from The X-Men, I didn?t believe them until I looked in the mirror. At the practice I told my coach how weak I was and that I needed to go to the doctor so I would be leaving early, he was more than happy and told me that I should have told him earlier about my weakness. Before I went to the doctor I was in the locker room changing, I wrote on my locker "Don't go near my locker I have a strange disease and I don?t know" I wrote this as a joke messing around trying to exaggerate whatever I had, but little did I know.

The first thing the doctor said when she walked into the room was "Yeah". I sat there on the examination table all yellow and sick like a clown at a funeral. I knew I had something serious because the doctor looked at me and
immediately called every other doctor in that practice to come into the room and look at me. They asked what my symptoms were and I told them, my urine could be mistaken for a cup of coffee, my stools were gray, I had a
ridiculous pain in my lower back, I look yellow, and I am extremely tired all the time. They told me that I needed blood work, and blood work fast so I was sent to Winthrop Hospital to get blood work done. The perception was
that I had Hepititious and that was to be confirmed by the blood sampling. I was in the emergency room with my Mom, Dad and older sister just waitingaround; doctors were looking me at like a male in a female prison. They had
no answers; I had to wait a day for the blood work to be done. I was sent home to wait, in pain. The next days were full of sleep and I had no contact with anyone outside of my family because I was always sleeping or in too much pain to speak on the telephone. The blood work came back negative and I still had no idea what was wrong with me. I went back to the doctor who told me that I needed a Sonogram, one of those tests that pregnant women
receive to look at the fetus. After that test I needed to have a CT Scan of my abdomen. All of these tests that were being performed on me required me not to eat, plus the doctors were telling me not to eat because they were unsure of what test I would have next. After my Sonogram my Mother and I pulled into North Shore Hospital Emergency room, where I would be spending the next 2 weeks of my life.

Entering the Hospital I still had no clue what was wrong with me, I was as lost as George W. Bush as the President of the United States. I had no idea, I didn?t feel alive test after test, and I just nodded my head and tried to make things easy for the doctors. The Doctors told me nothing, they just asked if this hurts, or that hurts, and if I had to go to the bathroom yet. The doctors then described to me what a CT scan or CAT scan was and what they intended to get from the results of the test. I didn?t care one bit about the test, all I cared about was getting it over with so I could eat for the first time in about a day and a half. After the test I had a hot dog and it was great, but because I'm so smart I forgot that hot dogs make you burp and every time you burp you use your stomach muscles to contract your stomach and my stomach wasn?t really well at the time so it hurt a lot. The doctors then came to me and explained that they needed a closer look at my stomach to see what the "real problem was" and that they
didn?t get enough results from the CT scan they wanted more evidence. So I was having surgery first thing the next morning, they put me in a room and asked me tons of questions about myself all in which I was completely honest
with. I didn't let this get to me; I really didn't get nervous I said "Do what you have to do to make me better."

The next day was absurd; the nurses woke me up to take me to the operating room. During pre-op though the operating assistant asked me if I drank, I wanted to be as honest as can be so I replied yes, they asked when you drink how much do you drink 2, 3 beers? It was kind of scary but at that time I was drinking a 12 with no problem. I was completely honest answering all the questions as my parents stood above me. I even answered honestly when they asked if I smoked pot, I just felt that being honest with the doctors would make things easier for them.They were doing a biopsy on my liver, taking a bone marrow sample out of my hip, and also spinal fluid. I just nodded my head and hoped for the best my Mom and Dad cried as they pushed me into the operating hall. I didn?t really get that nervous until I was pushed into the hallway. I have never been more horrified in my whole life
to be rolled down the hall and look into the rooms of operating patients, words just wont describe it. Getting on to the table and strapped in was scary and I said a prayer, its funny I really try not to think about this and this is the first time I have thought about it in a while. But the surgeons were great, they were making me laugh and I was making them laugh. The aneseteologist asked me what college I was planning on attending (college?) I said Oneonta, he replied "Oooohhhh STONEONTA heh!?!?, well here's the good stuff that'll make you feel all good" I was cracking up those guys really helped a lot. The next thing I knew it was 4 hours later and I was throwing up screaming and cursing at anyone who tried to talk to me.

I woke up in a hospital room that night after surgery; I could see my father in the hallway standing. I still did not know what was wrong with me, and I don?t know why but I looked at him and I said, ?Dad, do I have c-c-cancer?? he just shook his head yes in reply, then I closed my eyes and went to sleep. I remember this all like it was yesterday, but typing this now and thinking about the whole story and situation sounds like a movie. The new
world I was suddenly a member of really straightened me; it showed me what life was. I?m a 17-year-old kid just breathing in a hospital bed. A few days after my surgery my friends had all come up to the hospital to visit me, it was my first experience of being visited I had no idea how to react.My Doctor (who is still my primary doctor today) had come to see me, he saw me smiling having fun with my visiting friends but he was there to tell me and I quote ?This is not going to be fun and games, your going to get very sick? Quite frankly at first I sincerely disliked the man for saying that, telling me how sick I was going to be and how its not going to be easy, but as time went on I understood why he came in and told me how hard it was going to be. The beginning of treatment wasn?t bad, it was a new experience and my out going personality always welcomed new experiences so I didn?t make this different than anything else. The doctors explained the cycle of treatments that I would be receiving, that I would be in the hospital for 1 week receiving aggressive chemotherapy and the following week I would spend home recovering and recuperating from the treatment. I had lots of visitor?s people coming in with flowers and other various gifts; it felt
great to see the support I had. My parents were breathtaking during the whole experience they rotated sleeping in the hospital with me so I wouldn?t be alone, which was the kindest thing anyone has ever done for me. They made
sure they were there for me all the time and I was so fortunate. I cannot explain the amount of love that I received from my family and community, people I did not even know were sending me get well cards and saying prayers
for me, and who was I just a kid who got sick. I felt bad, I was feeling full of guilt for receiving this much pity, I didn?t think I deserved it, and that is when I knew that I was beginning to change.

My outlook on life began to change; I began to learn about what life really was and how incredible it was. I was transformed into a loving boy who had a complete understanding and ultimate respect and love for the world and
everyone who lived in it. I would talk to my nurses and thank them repeatedly for helping me; my eyes were opened. I saw myself transforming into a sensitive boy, who understood the world.During treatment as a
Cancer patient until age 18 you join the American Cancer Society under pediatrics, which entitles you to a program called the Make a Wish Foundation. The wish foundation provides cancer patients with any wish they want in the entire world weather it be meet a star or go on a vacation the foundation provides patients with just about anything to their desire. The foundation to the day calls me to make a wish and I couldn?t, and cannot make a wish without feeling guilt. I don?t feel as if I deserve or need it. The way I feel is that I got my wish, I?ve got this appreciation for life and everything that is so incredible words cannot describe. The Bible reads in John chapter nine verse twenty- five ?Whereas once I was blind, now I can see? which is the exact way I feel.There is not a day in my life that I
cannot smile, or be happy. The world today just seems so caught up it?s forgotten to appreciate, before I was diagnosed I didn?t know what it was to see, or hear, if I were to see the grand canyon or something as beautiful as
a sunset I would just shrug it off, that?s the thing most people don?t take the time to appreciate the world we live in. It seems deranged to say but Cancer in a way is a paradox, it kills you, but it helps you. I?m a new person, I have the ability to see the world in a new light now, I learned more about life and myself than I ever will and I cherish that. The way of handling a situation as drastic as Cancer is hard you can take the easy road and point the finger by blaming people and hate the world for you being sick. Or you can take it as it is, say yeah I do have cancer but that?s life and that?s the way the dice roll, why blame the world? Why not try to make the best out of the situation and try to take something meaningful out of the experience? That?s always the way I saw it, a close friend of mine
told me when I was first diagnosed ?Joe, if I were you I would be like Damn Why God? Why?? but I never thought of it that way, you cant ask why, its just like asking why when someone dies, there is no why you just have to accept it that is life, accepting and understanding.

I was completely transformed into a new person with a new outlook on life. When I was put into remission (which means that I am off treatment) I came out of the hospital the happiest man in the world. I managed to graduate

High School, and was actually accepted to a college in Long Island University. The world was brand new to me and I loved every minute of it. I went to school that following year and did great, I finished with a 3.25 GPA which I am extremely proud of I never did well in school. I stopped smoking pot and drinking, it was the first time in my life when I actually felt good about who I was. I had something to be proud of, I went from a kid who did nothing with his life but get intoxicated and have no respect or love for anyone, to a guy who has the outmost respect for life and everyone in it. I feel as if cancer broke me down like a building and built me back up, stronger and improved. I feel like there?s nothing I can?t do, and all I am doing is finding ways to improve myself. The strangest thing happened today though, as I was typing this very paper I picked up a fortune from a fortune cookie and it reads ?You?re transforming yourself into someone who is certain to succeed?, If I didn?t get sick I do not know where I would be right now, but I know that in one way I am better off having cancer now.

The Good Ole Days
By Lance D. Smith
Email: ldswordsmith at comcast.net
These are the good ole days, I am sure of it! Right now and each one after that are the good ole days. I remember the exact moment I discovered this phenomenon!
I was living in Mississippi and just graduated college. Looking back on those times, I have great memories. I had just married the most beautiful person I know and was embarking on a promising new career. We owned several beautiful horses, recently purchased two new vehicles (one was a 5.0 Mustang GT, that brought out the kid in me).
But when I was actually living it I was stressed to the max! Only in my memories and hindsight allow me to enjoy those times. Call me strange, but I don?t think I am the only one who this has happened to.
During those times, I was preoccupied with the daily stress that robs us all. I am not a morning person and my new career required I had to be mentally sharp, bright eyed, and ready to roll when all the normal people of the world slept. I was tired. I had new bills to pay, a new wife and life, and contemplated relentlessly with the numerous possibilities about my future.
I dwelled on the next payday, quitting time, and stressed in my career that I would make an error and accidentally kill somebody. I lived for bedtime, sleep, weekends, and vacations, riding my horse or in the Mustang, but rarely lived for ?where I was at the moment.?
As you can begin to see, living like this can seduce someone to resent their lives and where they are most of the time.
I am not complaining and I realize this pales in comparison to what others have gone through in their lives. It was a time in my life without any ?real? problems or catastrophes. But that is my point. Life was good, looking back. Why couldn?t I enjoy it while it was happening?
The answer. I focused on the future and ignored the present moment and my life suffered for it. I reduced my moments to something I had to endure to get me through to the next big thing.
To add insult to injury, when the ?next big thing? finally arrived, I didn?t enjoy it either! I had built it up in my mind so much that it rarely lived up to my expectations! I was imprisoned behind invisible walls I set up that cut me off from any real joy in my life. I was rarely happy!

Thank God I woke up! I remember the exact moment I got out of this quagmire. It was one summer day on the lake. I had a new twenty-one foot Bay Liner ski boat. It was sweet and real nice and, oh well never mind all of that. Anyway, we planned all week to go to the lake on this day.
Me and my wife and several friends loaded in the boat and got out on the water. As usual, I was not having a great time or enjoying myself! This particular day, I don?t recall if I was upset because the wind was too high, the waves too rough, too many boats on the water, a rain coming, or someone was doing something that caused concern for their personal safety.
My wife tilted up her sunglasses and looked over at me from the passengers seat.
She asked, ?What is wrong with you? What is the point in coming out here if you don?t enjoy it? I wish you would chill out.?
She dropped her sunglasses back over her eyes, sat back in her seat and put her feet upon the dash. She rubbed Hawaiian tropic on her legs, looked over and shot me a quick smile. Then she laid back to soak up all the sun she could. Everything thing in her day was going great, except for me!
I sat back in my seat and slumped underneath the steering wheel of the boat. If I had smoked, this was the time to light up. The truth and honesty of her question struck me to the core. I was mad and wanted to justify all the reasons I was so frustrated.
But as I sat there, withholding comment for the first time in my life, I realized she was right! I deserve to be happy! I am on the lake and spent good money to be here! I looked forward to this all week long! I was off work! I had a great boat! I had good health and good friends and a wife who loves me. This is the good times and I am missing it!
It was that moment I began to make a conscious decision about my life. From then on, I wanted moments in my life to simply occur. I was weary and tired of battling them.
Now, years later, when I am doing something as simple as pouring or drinking a cup of coffee, I want to be there and enjoy it fully while I am doing it, not afterward.
If you accept the moment and not insist on what you think it should or shouldn?t be, you open yourself up to clearer choices, joy, and peace. Otherwise, denying or resenting the moment cuts us off from our real lives.
I have small children. One day, all too soon, I wont. You can bet I have allowed myself to enjoy those little feet pitter-pattering through the house.
I have a great wife, good life, great health, a wonderful family and friends. Thank God I can see that now, not after it is too late.
Plan for the future and learn from the past. But live and come alive today, right here, right now.
"You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, and find your eternity in each moment." - Henry David Thoreau
Enjoy Life,
Lance

The Crash
by Lance D. Smith
ldswordsmith at comcast.net

The crash this morning occurred just mere minutes before my arrival. No police or emergency crew had yet arrived. There was an obvious victim, loss of life. I saw an imminence of a person lay intertwined and tangled in the metal as I passed by the wreckage. As traffic resumed normal speed, it was like I was launched to go on about my day. The next moment simply came, however I was still stuck in the previous moment, thinking about the poor man and his family. I wanted to stop as grief struck me, but I wasn't allowed to stay any longer in that moment. An impatient motorist behind me honked his horn for me to move onward. He had somewhere he needed to be and I was holding him up.
I felt for the victim of the wreck and his family. I thought how they probably haven't learned of his fate yet. I was consumed with thinking how this was his last morning to do life. It was his last time to shave, the last time he hugged or kissed his children. He probably packed his lunch as usual, got into his vehicle and drove to work; not suspecting it would be the last time. His mind was probably occupied on the mundane things that distract us all. Maybe he was thinking about his phone bill, or being rushed to get to work. He may have gotten mad as he approached the traffic jam that claimed his life. I wondered this. If any of us could know that today may be our last, how might we live our lives? Would we be empowered and live on "purpose" or would we be paralyzed in fear?
I arrived at work and parked in my usual spot. As I got out and walked my routine walk into the building, the morning was different. I could not help but notice how everyone that passed me seemed to be lost, preoccupied. They seemed to be sleepwalking and were far away from where they stood in that moment. They all seemed to be daydreaming, like they were gazing into a fire. Then I heard two men in a near argument over their political positions as each defended their versions and concepts. One argued the President was right while the other that he was wrong. Then another conversation I tuned in on was whether the Titans faired well in the draft. All of these people were unsettled and near anger, but they were "charged!" I could not help but think back on the victim in the wreckage who had lost his life and now how insignificant all these arguments seem to me right now. I wanted to turn around and walk up to them and say, " Who cares about this, why are you arguing with one another over this stuff? Can you be kind to each other? If you don't enjoy one another's company, walk away. What is the point? Go call your wives and kids and tell them how much you love them! You may have seen them for the last time this very morning. This could be your last conversation ever! Don't you get it! If you died a few moments from now, is this what you would have wanted to spend your last few moments doing? Is this stuff what your life is really about?"

Our lives are right under us, inside of us, not "out there" somewhere that constantly needs tending, battling, fighting, and changing. Each of our moments provides us an opportunity to love, hate, unite, or separate. It's unfortunate how much energy we use to argue and fight over what we think needs changed in order to make it all the way we see it. We waste precious time arguing and faultfinding in trivial things. But if arguing and faultfinding is what someone wants to experience, then so be it. That will be their experience.
But what peace does that create? What real impact does that make? It is like looking in the mirror and arguing with the image to change into what you want it to look like.
When we are upset we blame others for our misery. This isolates us from one another. We erroneously think "they" made me feel what I feel. We forget that we participated in creating what we experience, and we are the ones who experience what we feel internally. Not the other person. We think that we must change them or our external worlds in order to bring peace to our internal worlds. That's backwards! Real peace and joy is created from the "inside out, not outside in."
On the same day one man prays for rain, while another prays for sunshine. How does life accommodate them both? The man who wants the sunshine will argue with the man who prays for rain. He will criticize, humiliate, shame, battle, and isolate him because his needs and desires tell him he is ok. It is not because he is vindictive, but because his identity has been challenged and he needs others to validate and support what he feels and thinks. Deep down he has fears so he takes the road to criticize and belittle outwardly, rather than explore inwardly to see what he can discover about his true self.
I think this is the very reason we have experiences everyday that we don't like. Instead of seeing these opportunities as a time we can grow and reveal a better version of ourselves, we waste time changing the scenery to make our feelings go away. The scenery will change from moment to moment, and does so on its own. It will change, but it will show us the same old thing if we haven't looked inwardly and found our true power that brings about real change.
I hope for the man in the fatal wreck. I hope he really lived his life! I hope he experienced his purpose in being here. I hope his life hadn't been reduced to embed himself in issues over politics, sports, or trivial matters. I hope he didn't hang onto some passing event that was long gone and had little meaning in the end. I hope he didn't waste his time consumed in petty problems, rather than brilliant discoveries. I hope he had a chance to "happen to life," instead of life "happening to him." I hope his obstacles in life didn't steer him off course and left him bitter. I hope he lived his dreams. I hope he was not afraid to express the love that only he could uniquely express. I hope he left his mark, made his ripple and splash in the sea of life.

And finally, I hope he didn't become paralyzed in fear and give up and drown. I hope none of us do.
I think life was meant to be enjoyed, not endured.

A group of frogs was traveling through the woods, and two of them fell into a deep pit. All the other frogs gathered around the pit.
When they saw how deep the pit was, they told the unfortunate frogs they would never get out.
The two frogs ignored the comments and tried to jump up out of the pit.
The other frogs kept telling them to stop, that they were as good as dead.
Finally, one of the frogs took heed to what the other frogs were saying and simply gave up. He fell down and died.
The other frog continued to jump as hard as he could.
Once again, the crowd of frogs yelled at him to stop the pain and suffering and just die. He jumped even harder and finally made it out.
When he got out, the other frogs asked him, "Why did you continue jumping? Didn't you hear us?" The frog explained to them that he was deaf. He thought they were encouraging him the entire time.

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This story teaches two lessons:
1. There is power of life and death in the tongue. An encouraging word
to someone who is down can lift them up and help them make it through
the day.
2. A destructive word to someone who is down can be what it takes to
kill them. Be careful of what you say. Speak life to those who cross
your path.
The power of words....it is sometimes hard to understand that an
encouraging word can go such a long way. Anyone can speak words that
tend to rob another of the spirit to continue in difficult times.
Special is the individual who will take the time to encourage another.
May your words be a blessing to someone today.
-- Author Unknown

This is an amazing story that myself and my children continue to deal with and I hope you will keep us in your prayers. Maybe in some way this will help just one person feel like they are not alone when traumatic things happen.

I am a mother of four beautiful children who are my world. My oldest child was fifteen and went for a walk one day and within a quarter mile of my home, at her friends house, three people broke in the house and tortured my child by making her watch them kill her three friends. They stabbed my child over twenty times, shot her twice and then cut her throat. They tried to burn the house down and when they left my daughter escaped threw a back door only to be captured again by the same peolpe who did this horrible act.

A child came to my home and told me that the house was on fire and I was the first one there along with my other 12 year old daughter who was screaming "Get my sister out mom, I told her I hated her and I don't, GET HER OUT" I hear that every night before I go to bed to this day.

I kicked the door because it was stuck and a boot fell in front of me and without thinking I grabbed that child by his leg and pulled him out, he was dead. My daughter said "Oh no mom. not-----" I ran in and out holding my breath each time I entered it was so black then my daughter started breaking windows out so that the smoke would get out. As the smoke lifted I saw a child on the couch and I screamed to him " Come on we have to get out of here" Then I could see that he too was dead,( he had no face) they had shot him and burned him badly.
I remember jumping up and down screaming for someone to help me and people seem to just stand at the road confused. Then I heard someone call my name and say" She's in the road" I grabbed that person and said is she alive? they said "run, just run.

There are no words to discribe what I saw my child was gasping for air and mouthing the words" I love you mom"

My child fought for her life for weeks and she has been threw so much mentally but, I will tell you that it is by the grace of God my child has graduated high school and attends college.

This was a high profile case and I guess that the state felt like they had a point to prove or something but, about a week after my child was home the state came in and removed all of my children because" I was not supervising my 15 yr old playing in the front yard"

I am fighting to get them back but I'll be honest I have no money and a Court appointed attorney who has not done anything for me. Please pray that when I go to Court in a couple of months they all come home. I am so lost. I am trying to buy a house but with terrible credit it is not happening. The Court wants me to do so many things which I have done all except to buy a trailer/home. So will you pray for us for that too. Thank you so much.