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Sunday February 05 2006 11:51:59 pm
My children and I need help
Detail Description:
I have no idea where to start , I am the 40 year old father of 5 children and the step father of 5 more so to speak. The last 4 years have been to say the least devistating. 2000 came in like a lion I lost my income , business and hopes of ever getting out of the hole I was close to getting out of . I started another business working day and night , investing every dime I had to build the business up. Searching for a stable secure income. Late in 2000 I developed health problems which had me going in and out of the hospital and keeping me from working. Against all odds I managed to get back on my feet with Gods help. I Married in 2002 because my current partner in life becames pregnant and having 4 children already i was not about to allow a child come into this world with out me having rights and the child having a father. this was a mistake in the long run . My son was still born. We had just paid off the house I had bought in 1999 but had no insurance because of 911. One week after my son died our house and everything we owned burned to the ground. I continued to work towards building the business since it was the only thing we had left and our only chance at living. My wife refused to work , suffering from depression. A friend Loaned us the money to buy another house. I dumped everything I was making into it but winter set in and my wife still could not hold a job. November I received a phone call from Des Moinse , Iowa. My two daughter had been placed into foster care , their mother was on drugs . Sending me into a state of panic. I began the long fight to get custody of the children I had fought for since the day they were born. I already had joint physical custody and legal but Iowa Code says they have to put the family back together as they took it apart. Spring of 2003 the friend that loaned me the money to buy another house asked if he could sell it since we were severaly behind on payments. We agreed since there was abosolutely no way we could get caught up and finish the remodleing on the house. I had invested roughly $6000.00 and all of my labor into it. He ws nice enough to give me a check back , it was only for $300.00 but I was greatful at that point to get anything back. I expanded the business and kept fighting to get custody of my children. My wife became pregnant again in April of 2003 , she still refused to work and I was at a point where I could handle it no more , I think she sensed this and got pregnant on purpose. I later found out that she was a major cause of me not getting custody of my children. My daughter Amy was born in Dec of 2003 . My wife refused to go to work after the baby was born , I held out and hoped that she would see how much better things could be if she would become a part of the team . I hoped that she would understand if she did not help me I was going to end up in Jail for non payment of child support and or in the hospital from a heart attack. she made the statement on the way to the child support hearing , " damn , I guess if you go to jail I will have to get a job" that blew my mind. Feb of 2004 I meet a long time friend of 12 years who went to work for me. We worked together and built the business up to be better and larger than I had ever expected. Things were going well except for my marrage. I filed for divorce because my wife decided to try to keep my child from me after I explain to her that if she would just hang on I would help here , pay off the bills , and we could part with both of us having a life. For the life of me I can not understand why she choose the hard route but she left me with no choice but to protect my daughter and my rights as a father. In the mean time My friend and I were getting very close. Her children had never neeb in a positive situation, she was raising them agaisnt all odds by herself. 5 of them .
I gained custody of my two daughters in March of 2004 and they came to live with me . I gained 50 - 50 custody of my Daughter Amy in august of this year aswell . August brought hard times though , the city I was operating in pased a new ordinance that basically put me out of business and forced me to move 1/2 mile out of town to be able to continue operating and protecting the residents and teenagers in the area. the move did not work though, I lost thousands of dollars and went severaly in debt. all this stress brought on health problems that had only been hiding. October this year my heart quit working, my body was beginning to shut down. Two surgerys and a pace maker later I am stil here . two weeks after getting out of the hospital I went for a check up , I was told my neck had been broken for 4 years. the nerves at the base of my skull were being pinched causing me to loose control of parts of my body . I have a appointment the 27th of this month ( the earliset they could get me in ) with the spinal clininc in Mayo in rochester, Mn.
In the mean time , My firend is working 5/ 12's to pay her bills and try to help me , I am watching her children during those days an trying to work Fri and Sat. to keep the business going . I personally have no income though as the business in not making enough to cover itself. We are living on Public assistance which is not paying the bills, My business is in a state of bankrupcy since I can not be there even if I wanted to . I have filed for SSI disability but have been told they will screw me around for almost a year. I am in fear that if I do not find some way out of this I will be evicated soon from my home , if this happens I wil loose my children two of them will go to foster care because the state will never allow their mother to have custody, My daughter Amy wil go to her mother who will never be able to give her a life, and I will become a shell of a man who fought all his life to be a dad to his children. We need help , we are running out of time, and now we have no options , only the hopes that I receive my SSI , and my business sells or becomes profitable enough agiain to pay of the debt. I pray daily for some sign that things will get better, I pray for the strength to keep going, I pray for my children and my freinds children as I have to look into theire face daily knowing I might be jerked out of all of their lives very soon. I am at my ropes end.
I hope someone is listening.
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